13 June 2010

Black Sheep

I've always been the different one in my family.  All of my siblings turned out exactly the same, then I ended up almost the opposite.  I think deep down I express myself the same way, but I communicate differently, which makes my parents treat me differently because they don't really know how to treat me.

I went home for the first time in four months(even though they only live 15-20 minutes away) for some family stuff we had going on, family in town, birthdays, graduations, etc.  It's a weird feeling coming back home when you've been in your own place, you don't really feel welcome,  like it's "home" but not "your home."  Anyway, I took Liz's wedding announcement with me, I knew my mom would want to see it, my mom loves to hear about how all of the girls I've dated and lost have done so much better than me...(except Ashley of course, I'm pretty sure the only thing my mom would like to see about her was an obituary.)

Before I continue, let me say, after my whiny post pining for Liz I realized I was being dumb.  Of course Liz seemed great, I only made a point to remember the good things, and even though I couldn't conjure up any negative memories about her I'm sure I have some, and I'm sure they're horrible!  I mean she dumped me!  I'm gonna win a freakin' Nobel Prize!  That'll show her!  At least Hannah isn't so ridiculous that she can't recognize what's right in front of her nose!  But seriously, I was emotional, when I actually stopped being a little girl and thought about it I realized, Sure, I would've been happy with Liz, but I learned things about myself during that break up that will bring me more happiness than I would've had otherwise.

Back to the story.  So my mom takes what feels like five minutes, looking at the picture.  Then she shows it to my little sister.  Then she puts it back in front of her face, I see her mouth start to open, I know she's going to tell me what I learned so painfully last weekend, that I'm better off.

"She's so cute, Oh she's so cute!"

WTF? ! ? !

What the heck mom!?  Thanks for the pat on the back!  Thanks for the words of support after I find out the girl I dated for a year is getting married to the guy she dumped me three weeks before dating!  I mean seriously, I thought Mom's knew better!

But you know what?  I don't care, Hannah's picture is still on the fridge, and Hannah won't sacrifice her ambitions to get a husband.  Luckily I texted Donna, she and my "refound cousin" are the only two girls I text since the Brandy fiasco.  I told her my Mom's ridiculous reaction, but at least Donna had my back and knew what to say.  "Why do you even care?  I've met them both, Hannah is way better.  Plus you look happier with her than you ever did with Liz!"

She was right, I shouldn't care, I don't care.  Like I've said, sometimes I just need to hear what I want to hear.


Claire said...


Sorry. That is kind of hilarious, and kind of horrible. Glad you had someone to give you a better reaction! Jeez.

singlemormonchick said...

your mom did fall a little short there. maybe she thinks you are so over liz and so in love with hannah that her words wont bother you. still...she shouldnt have gone on like that. just like claire, i am glad you had back up to confirm what you have now realized(after being a big cry baby :P )

Waiting On A Sister Missionary said...

No, Claire, it wasn't funny, it really sucked! I just presented it in a funny way so you wouldn't have to experience something so horrible.

Leigh said...

I find it incredibly ironic how you react surprised and hurt over your mom's reaction, and Liz getting married, after your 'Why Wait?' post.

You said yourself you don't think you'll be ready for marriage for a couple years, which means Hannah will have to wait for in return for you funnily enough. But because Liz has different values then you and feels ready for marriage now, she's 'sacrificing her ambitions' and you're free to pass judgment on her? Why DO you even care?

Sounds to me like you aren't secure enough in your relationship with Hannah to know if she's got marriage potential, so it's probably a good thing you are dating other people in the mean time! Poor girl, hope she doesn't have any high hopes set on you.

Waiting On A Sister Missionary said...

Poor girl? What about me? I FEEL!

She sacrificed her ambitions, and not just because "she feels ready for marriage now."

I care because, like Bret Michaels said, "Like I knife that cuts you, the wound heals but the scar remains."